I remember first hearing my Christian high school friends talking about getting together with “older women” from their church for mentorship. As a high schooler, I wasn’t exactly sure what they meant, but remembered thinking it cool that an adult was taking time to hang out with a teenager! I certainly appreciated times that two different pastors from my church took time to spend with me, hang out, ask questions, give advice, etc. Although I appreciated those relationships, I certainly didn’t have anything as intentional as a mentorship with them.
Fast forward, gosh, how many years….I think I’ve been out of high school for 13 years. I still have not yet had a mentor, mostly because there haven’t been older women (outside of my family) that I really felt like I connected with. After moving a few hours away from family, I have felt a greater need to have wise Godly women in my life. Literally for over a year I have been praying specifically for a mentor-like relationship. One woman from my church, whom I hardly know at all, has come to mind every single time I’ve prayed about it. No one else. My husband has encouraged me to call her and ask her to be a mentor to me, but I have just lacked courage and initiative.
Courage at last!
Two weeks ago, an 8th grade girl from church approached me and asked me if she and I could meet once in awhile. The more I talked to her, I realized that she was looking to me as a mentor (and had this confirmed with a follow-up conversation with her mom). I was honored and delighted–this young woman is on fire for the Lord! I have been excitedly thinking of ways that God may want to direct this relationship. Recognizing my own weaknesses and my current need to be encouraged and challenged, I have also been feeling a pressing need to get up my gumption (heck, a 13 year old could do it!) and call the woman, let’s just call *V*, that God kept putting in my mind as my own mentor.
Monday night at our church’s Ladies’ Christmas Tea, *V* was in my direct line of vision the whole night. I listened to another woman, whom I also admire, from our church speak and while I thought she would also make a good mentor, the Lord kept pulling me towards *V*. I didn’t get a chance to visit with her that night, but finally called her today. I encouraged her to pray about it first, but she said that her first inclination was a resounding “yes.” I feel as excited as a….13 year old who gets to hang out with a grown up! 😉 She immediately referenced Titus as the Biblical responsibility for older women to be encouraging younger women. Titus 2 says:
3Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good.4Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
*V* and I agreed to pray over the holidays about how we should proceed and then try to connect after the first of they year. Ultimately, I would love to just get to know *V* better–I think we have similar, yet not identical, personalities. If God so leads us, somehow I would like to obtain wisdom, advice, and encouragement from a woman who has been married for many more years than myself, who has raised her children, who has walked with the Lord longer than I’ve been alive (ha, ha, I’ll have to tell her that!), and has made some mistakes and learned some lessons. Seeing as I’ve never had a mentor, I’d love to hear from some of you who have (or who have been Godly mentors to younger women than yourself). What are some things that worked? Did you do a specific Bible Study? Did you set Godly goals? Did you just visit and pray? I’d love to hear what others have done!